Your relationship is going through a very rough patch. You don’t know how much more you can take of the abuse, the memory of abuse, the feeling of being abused. Abuse of trust, abuse of betrayal, abuse of sacredness, abuse of friendship, abuse of love.
If your partner in your relationship has abused you, once or continually, then you are obviously not enough for them.
They needed more than you.
You were not enough physically, emotionally or mentally.
They needed more than you.
Did they know the real You?
Did they know you in your worthiness?
Did they bother to look for, and find, the real You – at Soul level?
As you stood in your integrity;
as you stood in your truth;
as you stood in your faith;
as you behaved impeccably when no one was looking;
as your character was strengthened by your righteous behavior.
So they stooped down to discover their lack of integrity;
so they fell down in their lies, deceits and distrust;
so they lost their faith in themselves and in a Higher Being;
so they laid down with dogs and got fleas.
Their lack of self-pride and their low self-esteem enabled them to choose companions beneath their perceived social standing. In their hearts they did not feel worthy.
So it was easy to drop their perceived standards,
as easy as it was for them to drop their underwear!
In their unworthiness they fell into a black hole of self-pity.
They blamed everyone but themselves and they justified their actions to themselves and anyone else who would listen.
It is not that you were not enough for them;
it is that they were not enough for them.
It is that they were not acceptable to themselves.
They feared rejection from you.
If you only knew who they really were – in their low self-esteem and lack of self-pride – you would reject them – so they thought.
They have known rejection in their past.
Rejection sticks to them like a shadow.
They will go anywhere with anyone and do anything to gain acceptance.
It is not their addiction that they want satisfied – it’s acceptance they want satisfied – because they fear rejection.
Because their self-esteem is so low they cover up this black hole with bravado.
They are so fearful that they think that if you knew the real person that lurks inside them, you would reject them.
So they reject you!
You are not enough for them.
They need more and more.
The truth of the matter is that they are not enough for them.
They feel incomplete. They feel inferior. They feel not whole.
They feel unworthy.
They feel unworthy of you.
They feel unworthy of themselves.
They feel unworthy of your relationship.
To justify this feeling of unworthiness, they go flat out to prove themselves unworthy.
It becomes a self-creating, self-fulfilling prophecy.
In their unworthiness they want to self-destruct.
Perhaps you can remember a time that you felt unworthy?
Perhaps you can remember what it felt like to have low self-esteem,
lack of self-pride and low self-respect?
Perhaps you can remember how you betrayed yourself and allowed others
to give you conditional love in exchange for mistreating or abusing you in some way?
Perhaps you can remember a time you felt you were in a black hole of self-pity?
Perhaps your partner came to show you a mirror of this time – as a Soul Contract?
Do you remember how you struggled to get out of the black hole?
Do you remember the anger, frustration, anguish, tears, remorse and guilt?
Do you remember the sleepless nights, the emotional torture chamber you were in?
Do you remember falling to your knees and asking, no pleading, for help from Above?
Do you remember how your ego had to be recognized as your driving force?
Do you remember how you had to fall and fail to hit rock bottom?
Do you remember how you started consciously replacing fear-based Ego with love-based Soul?
Do you remember how you changed your thought pattern from “What would Ego do now?” to “What would Love do now?”
Do you remember how you started giving love to small things, every day things?
Do you remember learning inch by inch, moment by moment, how to move from unworthiness towards worthiness?
Do you remember the reward of value you felt in yourself, inside you, when you stood in your integrity, in your new found self-trust, self-love, when offered past temptations, and said “No thank you – I’ve had enough” and smiled to yourself, inside?
Do you remember your journey towards worthiness as you stood in your Integrity, in your Truth, in your Faith and behaved impeccably when no one was looking?
Do you remember standing and feeling very tall in your new found unconditional self-love?
If someone had come along and given you an instant cure for your ills, pop this pill, swig this down, spray this on – you will feel better by tomorrow.
What value would you have felt?
How committed would you have been to your new found journey towards worthiness?
First the labor then the reward.
No instant cure – no quick fix remedy;
Supplication, application, perseverance, dedication,
discipline, determination, perspiration, inspiration;
these are the attributes of people succeeding in the journey towards worthiness in their lives.
Now We go back to you and your partner.
You now in your worthiness;
They still in their unworthiness.
You can choose to help them find their real selves.
You cannot change them;
you can only point out to them, in love that they must go on a journey of Self Discovery.
To move from feeling unworthy as their ego tells them,
to find their worthiness which comes from operating from Soul?
Their journey is from Ego to Soul;
from unworthiness to worthiness.
They have to learn to change their thinking
From “What would Ego/Fear do now?”
to “What would Soul/Love do now?”
The big question is where will you be while their new journey takes place?
If you have stood in your integrity, in your truth, in your faith and found the unconditional love inside of you, then you are already in your worthiness.
Are you prepared to go back and help them with their journey of Self Discovery?
After all it’s their journey.
After all they stopped loving you.
After all they rejected you and abused you.
After all they chose someone or something else.
After all – after all you have suffered?
If you, in your worthiness, stand at the finish line,
how do you think they will feel about you as they stumble and fall?
in their journey of Self Discovery?
This is their journey, their life choice, their Soul Contract.
You facilitated their self-journey via your Soul Contract with them, as they did with you.
If you stand in their shoes, how will they heal, grow and evolve into worthiness?
This choice takes courage.
How do you ensure that you are coming from Soul, from Love, in making this choice?
This choice is not only for spiritual healing and growth.
What about your feelings, emotions, physical needs, memories of times shared?
What about the impact of others, children, family, friends?
If they were a moth transforming into a beautiful butterfly,
with this transformation taking place in a cocoon, and you saw the cocoon shaking as the butterfly attempted to break free of the cocoon, would you ease its frustration by cutting open the cocoon to free the butterfly?
If you did do that, you would stop the butterfly from strengthening its wings by pushing against the cocoon to break it so it could have the strength to fly. If you did “rescue” the butterfly from its perceived unfair struggle, you would have imprisoned it for life as it lay weak and defenseless on the ground.
This choice takes courage.
Where do you stand as your partner goes on their journey towards worthiness?
Stand in your Integrity; stand in your Trust,
stand in your Faith; stand in your Unconditional Self Love.
Stand as close, or stand as far, as you can stand, to remain in your worthiness while their journey towards worthiness occurs.
You will know from your feelings – the language of your Soul – where you want and need to be through this courageous passage.
If you stand in Being, or if you stand in doing, will determine how you travel on your continual journey of worthiness.
If you are a Human Being or a human doing in this process will determine where you stand as your partners journey to worthiness commences.
There is no right or no wrong place to stand here.
You are entitled to receive your rewards in your worthiness.
Only you can make the choice, courageously, what those rewards will be.
Whether you stand by as the butterfly emerges – perhaps to fly away, or to stay;
or whether you turn your back on the shaking cocoon in search of someone worthy of you now
or whether you break open the cocoon to “rescue” the butterfly.
This choice will determine how you travel on your continual journey of worthiness.
Your partner’s journey is incidental now.
The choices you make, courageously now,
will be determined by your feelings of worthiness.
Nothing is guaranteed – only your healing, growth and evolvement.
Feelings are the language of the Soul.
If, in time, you feel happiness and if you feel bliss through your choice,
then you will know that it was the right choice for you.
If you feel sad and if you feel empty,
after a realistic, reasonable time, then perhaps it was the wrong choice for you.
Then choose again, if you are able to.
You are courageous in choosing the continual journey of worthiness.
To ensure that you stay on this journey of worthiness make sure you do not betray yourself to yourself
by accepting conditional love while being manipulated and controlled, as before.
Only accept the unconditional love inside of you as you now travel on your continual journey of worthiness.
In making a choice, remember:
CHOICE – Courageously Helping One In Choosing Evolvement